A bind-up of two books:

The Miseducation Years of Ross O'Carroll-Kelly:

The Diary of a Schools Rugby Player is a 2000 novel by Irish journalist and author Paul Howard, and the first in the best-selling Ross O'Carroll-Kelly series. It was adapted from a series of columns by Howard in the Irish newspaper, the Sunday Tribune.

The Teenage Dirtbag Years. The second book in the series

So there I was, roysh, class legend, schools rugby legend, basically all-round legend, when someone decides you can't, like, sit the Leaving Cert four times. Well that put a focking spanner in the works. But joining the goys at college wasn't the mare I thought it would be, basically for, like, three major reasons: beer, women and more women. And for once I agree with Fionn about the, like, education possibilities. I mean, where else can you learn about Judge Judy, laminating fake IDs and, like, how to order a Ken and snog a girl at the same time?

I may be beautiful, roysh, but I'm not stupid and this much I totally know: college focking rocks.