I was on the Luas last August, and was standing next to these two Cork guys. Guy #1: ‘Did you hear that some celebrity was stabbed yesterday?’Guy #2: ‘What? Who? What happened?’Guy #1: ‘Well, they were out with your woman Reese ... Reese ...

Reese ... Whatsername?’Guy #2: ‘Witherspoon?’Guy #1: ‘With a spoon? No, with a knife! You can't stab someone with a spoon!’

I was flying back from London recently, when we landed the steward makes the usual landing announcement over the intercom and finishes with: 'If you've enjoyed your flight with us, please tell your friends, if not, tell them you flew with another airline.'

Sitting in an antenatal class and the midwife starts explaining about when the baby is born. She is going through how your partner is asked to cut the cord and a youngish Dublin girl interrupts her.

She asks if this is when you can ask for an ‘inny’ or an ‘outty’ belly button. Needless to say the midwife has to check that the girl is being serious. All of us other women have to try not to look at each other and hold in our giggles as the girl defends herself saying she thought you could choose!