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The Shelbourne Ultimatum

The Shelbourne Ultimatum

Ross O' Carroll Kelly

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Ross’s brush with death makes him a more caring decent human being – yeah, roysh

I woke up from a coma to a country that had changed beyond all recognition. Shrewsbury Road had become a ghost estate. Marks and Spencer were selling microwavable coddle. And a Euro discount store was about to open in the Powerscourt Townhouse Centre. God, I was only unconscious for twenty-four hours. Then I was told that the Gords wanted to talk to me.

They were pretty interested in finding out who shot me. The problem was that I couldn't actually remember? The entire incident was a basic blank. I woke up to at least some good news, though. Whoever pulled the trigger had missed my vital organs by inches - including the most vital one of all. I made a promise, there and then in St Vincent's Private Hospital, that I wasn't going to waste another minute of my life. There were, like, thousands of beautiful women out there and many of them had never known the pleasure of my company. That was going to change - the second I got off those crutches.

The problem with life, of course, is that it's always trying to keep you grounded. I had a daughter who hated my basic guts, a son who was growing up way too fast and a soon to be ex wife who was resorting to increasingly desperate measures to stop the bank from repossessing the house. Oh, and the Gords - get this! - thought I was lying to them. Lying? Me?

Additional Information

Author Ross O' Carroll Kelly
Publisher Penguin
Publication date 27 Sep 2012
Format Paperback
ISBN/EAN 9781844882281

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