But fear no more, as excretion expert Hugh Jassburn has put together a compendium of entertaining activities and informative fun that will make you want to stay put, even if you don't need to go.

Doing a number two will never be the same again. 'Every toilet should have a copy of this book next to it.' Frank Aeces, WHAT TOILET? magazine 'From poo puzzles to poo facts, pooing has never been so much fun.' Dr Dum Ping, POO MONTHLY